Why do I second guess myself so much? I know in my heart that God is making things possible for me to go back to school. It's what I've wanted for so long. So why am I wondering if it is truly His will? But yet, I can't help but feel that I'm forcing something to happen. Maybe I am but maybe I'm just being neurotic about it.
But I don't want to forsake His will and word just to get ahead. TobyMac sings "I don't want to gain the whole world and lose my soul," which is obviously referring to Mark 8:36. But no matter who says it, the message is the same. What is the point of gaining all of these material things if you have to sacrifice your beliefs to get them? Our society strives for perfection and excellence in all we do, at any cost. But as Christians, we have to remember that we are in the world but not of the world.
But it is so hard to remember that when we are just trying to make it through this place without pulling out our hair and losing our sanity. We all just want to feel that we are doing something besides taking up space and air. But we are. We are hear to glorify Our Savior in our own ways and to learn and grow and experience life. As long as we can manage that much, I think, the rest of it should be somewhat manageable.
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